Killer On The Road

In our everyday lives, we watch our parents drive almost every day. They drive us to school, they drive us to work, and they drive us to the cinema or even to our friends place. Every time we get into the car with our father, he tries to teach us something new about handling a car. And at the age of 17 we take our first driving license lessons.

These days, we are exposed to a lot of accidents, most of them, involve young drivers in them. Therefore, I think that the age of getting a driver license should be raised to 19 for a few reasons. First, there is something ironic in giving a teenager a weapon at the age of 18, and giving him a driving license at the age of 17, because eventually, more people get killed in car accidents than being killed by a gun(How is this argument relevant to what you have stated earlier, in the second sentence of this paragraph?).

Moreover, the army has a large part in designing our personality. If you compare someone that has just being(gr. - been) recruited to the army, and someone who has already finished his army service, these are two completely different people.(Start a new sentence) that(ww.) because the army teaches us discipline and make(gr.) us mature and responsible. That(ww.), thanks to holding a gun in our hands, and getting punishment whether(ww.) we do something wrong- I don't see your point..

I think that the only way to reduce the accidents among young drivers is by increasing the enforcement. The only way, we can make young drivers understand that they are playing with fire, is to punish them whether(ww. - if/when) they act immature(ly). In addition, I think that the qualifications (required) for getting a driving license should be increased, so immature teenagers wouldn't have the chance to make a mistake on the road.

I still have a bit of a problem with your arguments, their relevance and the way you phrased them.
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Daphna