TechSchools

Technology these days(has) made our lives much easier. We have an air conditioner, so we can control the temperature in the room; we use cell phones to connect much faster and easier(gr. - more easily) with our friends. So (will)the technology, will(unnecessary) replace every single thing in our lives? In this essay I will relate to (a)more specific question:  Could computers replace teachers one day?

I say obviously no, for a few reasons. First, the human touch is something we all need, and still uses(phr.) although there is(gr.) chat(s) and computers to connect. We still go out with our friends, or hang out together. So, the human touch is something that can't be replaced by a computer, and students need the encourages(ww. - encouragements) and the personal treatment that only (a) human can give(ww. - provide).

In addition, these days we can see that the Bagrut exams test only grades(phr. - what do you mean?), and they don’t really test knowledge, therefore, exchanging teachers by(ww. - with) computers, will make this phenomenon rise(phr.). Not only that we would be tested by grades, we would be thought by computers(not clear what you are saying here).

For(ww. - In) conclusion, I want to state, that exchanging teachers with computers would cause more harm than good. This action would save some money, but students will graduate high school with no real life knowledge.

(78)
Daphna

Killer On The Road

In our everyday lives, we watch our parents drive almost every day. They drive us to school, they drive us to work, and they drive us to the cinema or even to our friends place. Every time we get into the car with our father, he tries to teach us something new about handling a car. And at the age of 17 we take our first driving license lessons.

These days, we are exposed to a lot of accidents, most of them, involve young drivers in them. Therefore, I think that the age of getting a driver license should be raised to 19 for a few reasons. First, there is something ironic in giving a teenager a weapon at the age of 18, and giving him a driving license at the age of 17, because eventually, more people get killed in car accidents than being killed by a gun(How is this argument relevant to what you have stated earlier, in the second sentence of this paragraph?).

Moreover, the army has a large part in designing our personality. If you compare someone that has just being(gr. - been) recruited to the army, and someone who has already finished his army service, these are two completely different people.(Start a new sentence) that(ww.) because the army teaches us discipline and make(gr.) us mature and responsible. That(ww.), thanks to holding a gun in our hands, and getting punishment whether(ww.) we do something wrong- I don't see your point..

I think that the only way to reduce the accidents among young drivers is by increasing the enforcement. The only way, we can make young drivers understand that they are playing with fire, is to punish them whether(ww. - if/when) they act immature(ly). In addition, I think that the qualifications (required) for getting a driving license should be increased, so immature teenagers wouldn't have the chance to make a mistake on the road.

I still have a bit of a problem with your arguments, their relevance and the way you phrased them.
(82)
Daphna  

Killer On The Road

In our everyday lives, we watch our parents drive almost every day. They drive us to school, they drive us to work, and they drive us to the cinema or even to our friends place. Every time we get into the car with our father, he tries to teach us something new about handling a car. And at the age of 17 we take our first driving license lessons.

These days, we are exposed to a lot of accidents, most of them, involve young drivers. Therefore, I think that the age of getting a drivers license should be raised to 19 for a few reasons. First, there is something ironic in giving a teenager a weapon at the age of 18, and giving him a driving license at the age of 17, because eventually, more people get killed in car accidents than being murdered in other way.

Moreover, the army has a large part in designing our personality. If you compare someone that has just been recruited to the army, and someone who has already finished his army service, these are two completely different people. Thats is because the army teaches us discipline and makes us mature and responsible. That, thanks to holding a gun in our hands and experiencing it, and getting punishment everytime we do something wrong.

I think that the only way to reduce the accidents among young drivers is by increasing the enforcement. The only way, we can make young drivers understand that they are playing with fire, is to punish them every time they act immaturely. In addition, I think that the qualifications for getting a driving license should be increased, so immature teenagers wouldn't have the chance to make a mistake on the road.

(80)
Daphna

Internet?

The internet was invented in the late 90's. The invention of the internet has changed our lives in several ways. Now we can share knowledge with peers all over the world. Sharing knowledge was made(ww.+gr.) much easier and faster.Now we can publish an article or a blog post, and in seconds all our friends can read it and comment on it. This phenomenon made(gr. - use the present perfect) our lives much easier and made a difference in our ways of communication.

In the past, If you wanted to talk with your peers on the other side of the globe, you needed to write a letter and send it by mail. It was a long process, and wasn’t so convenient, because sending an urgent letter wasn’t possible. Now, with the invention of the internet, sending an e-mail is just a matter of few seconds.

Despite all of the advantages, there are (a) few disadvantages. The main ones are pornography and lack of physical activity. With the fast flow of information , we can observe that pornography become much easier to access. Despite all of the parent control programs, pornography is still available 24 hours a day, to all the little kids on the planet. Another disadvantage is the lack of physical activity,because you sit infront of the computer the whole day and do not move much, which is very important (in order) to develop social skills in kids. The lack of it, causes the children, get into depressions(phr.), and have no real friends.

In conclusion, dispite  the disadvantages, that we try to minimize, the advantages overflow them. These days, we can save lives thanks to the great invention of the internet, by sending urgent messeges, such as sos. And(מיותר) saving lives is the most sacred thing in the world and nothing can compare with that.
How is the issue of saving lives relevant to what you have written in your essay? The conclusion is supposed to relate to whatever you have presented in your essay, summarize it and conlude.

(88)
Daphna

Written Presentation N.8

These days, we all graduate from high school with an exam called Matriculation. Each student's knowledge must be reflected by those exams in the best way. The bagrut exam consists of a few exams in each subject, for example Bible, Hebrew etc. Moreover, some of those exams are not obligatory like Physics, Chemistry, or even Biology.

I think that those exams don’t reflect each students knowledge, because the exams consists of a lot of material and not all the students have the ability to remember this amount of material. Moreover, not all students can deal with the stress durng the exam.I suggest schools all over the world to do those exams a bit differently, so they will reflect the student's knowledge and values.

First, students should be tested by a human and not by a robot, in an oral exam. This way, the student can reflect his knowledge even though he doesn’t know how to write a right answer. In addition, the examiner will test not only knowledge, but social skills by talking to the student, and knowing him better. Second, the tests shouldn’t be limited by time like now, so the students wouldn't be so stressed.

As a student in high school, I can say that those improvements will test knowledge better and I could get higher grades. In addition, those improvements, will take us to a newer age, where not only knowledge will
be tested, but social skills and manners as well.

(93)
Daphna